Episode 80: Julie Barnhill
Julie Barnhill joins me for episode 80. She is a well accomplished author and communicator. I heard about Julie probably 7 years ago. Someone that I viewed as a mentor—she was a few steps ahead of me—recommended that I read Julie’s book, She’s Gonna Blowafter I confided in her about feeling so angry as a mom. And if I’m really honest, I nearly resented becoming a mother. I just didn’t feel cut out for it. It seemed to bring out the worst in me. Yet, I was stuck. There was no take backs. No trading my people in for cats. I was so thankful for Julie’s book landed in my hands at that time.
Julie is one of the most vulnerable, honest and real people that I’ve met. Her vulnerability is contagious. So that is why I asked Julie to join me around the table. I want you to hear @@an honest conversation about surviving our anger issues when it comes to parenting@@. And I hope that if you are single or you don’t have kids that you won’t disregard this episode. I hope that it helps you see other women with a new lense—that it would build more compassion and empathy towards understanding what some women feel. So pull up a chair to the kitchen table and join the conversation.
- Relationships with her adult kids
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Takeaways From Our Conversation:
- I think that my biggest takeaway was the application step of asking God to reveal to you one thing that you can change. I feel like God is saying to me, “If you want your kids to come to you when they fail, then you need to change the way you respond. You need to be a sanctuary to them.” Yes. I’m thankful that God redeems all of those eye rolls and ughs and yells and disappointed looks. He can tear those down and build up something new. So that is where I am. That is what I am asking God to work on in me. Choose ONE thing that resonates with you and concentrate on that
- "Take back your brain.”
- @@Parenting is not a sprint---it's a marathon@@.
- Do unto your children, as you would have them do to your grandchildren.
- @@Small incremental changes in the right direction will change the course@@. Speak truth. Whether you feel it or not. Even if you don’t believe it. Speak it because its truth. Truth changes your heart and when you heart changes, your thinking changes and when your thinking changes, what you speak and do changes. Its incremental. It's connected.
- Underground issues that can cause an eruption of anger:
- Think about your past. That’s a bedrock that contributes to this. Who we are, where we come from, what kind of home were you raised in. You have to go through your past.
- Reality of what your life is like now.
- The child themselves. Know how they are wired. Know your child, know her temperament. Know how your temperaments operate together.
- Her final advice to a mom who is struggling with anger: God is in you, with you and for you and your child. He gave you the child that He wanted to give you. Speak the truth. Say it out loud. The enemy condemns. Condemnation is shaming. The holy spirit is conviction. Conviction says that was wrong but then He shows us what to do.
Thank you for following along life with me. I love being apart of your day. And as always, I hope this show helps you survive a little easier.
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